There are several “S” words that come to mind in connection with this vignette.  In the recent election, the voters decided to vote down a small increase in the sales tax that would have benefited the public transportation system in St. Louis City and County and beyond.  Taxes are bad!  Vote no.  Keep the money in your own pocket.  Right?  Nope!  I think the voters got this one wrong.

Today, Metro Link announced that there would be fare increases and service cutbacks as a result of the outcome of the vote.  Fewer buses will be running, and there is a good possibility of severe if not total elimination of bus service beyond I-270.

The down side is that a lot of people who live inside the I-270 loop have jobs beyond I-270.  They don’t make enough to own and operate a vehicle so they use public transportation to get to and from work.  But with the cutbacks, how will they get to work and make a living?  What will the people do who depend on them as employees?  The businesses?  The households?  One “S” word that won’t work is “smart” voters.  
 

Painting with a broad verbal brush, I think that what follows would apply no matter who was going to be the next president of the United States.

Both candidates were for change (however defined).  In little more than a month a new president will begin to implement change as he sees necessary.  Some attempts will succeed.  Some will not.  Some people will be happy.  Some will not.

But what I am finding irritating, among both liberals and conservatives, are the arm-chair quarterbacks (if I may mix some metaphors) who seem to think they can see into the future, and are already sharing with anyone who will listen their opinions about how things will go after January 20.  The opinions are opined as if they are profound truths, foreknowledge about what is going to happen.  Comments on cabinet choices ring with authority about what each choice means for the future.  I tend to categorize such “soothsayers” (with apologies to any real soothsayers in the audience) as yammering talking heads.  If only their cacophony could be silenced!  It gives me a headache.  “Let all mortal flesh keep silence…”

Why don’t we just wait and see how things go and give the new guy a chance?  In a year we can look back and see how things have gone and perhaps make some observations.  In the meantime <deleted>! 

My friend Candy shared this.  Pretty profound when you stop to think about it.

“If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.”
Author unknown

There is the hymn that begins, “There is a balm in Gilead…”  It needs a new verse.  “There is a balm in Advent…” 

Part of dealing with my anger has been a return to Advent this past Sunday after several weeks of absence.  I must confess my stomach was in a knot (not sure why).  The welcome back was overwhelming.  Embraces.  Words of support.  Several cards in the mail.

If someone asks you why people go to Church of the Advent, you can truthfully say that some go because it’s where healing happens.

Sounds like some sort of horror movie, or perhaps one about Dr. Mengele when he experimented on (tortured) children to satisfy his maniacal medical curiosity, but it isn’t.  It’s the decision that some mothers in Haiti make every day because there isn’t enough food for everyone.  The mothers must decide who will eat and who won’t.  They have to choose which child will live and which child will die.

There’s another country that is having similar problems, the United States.  Last year 691,000 children (almost the population of Austin, Texas) went hungry at some time, and close to one in eight struggled to feed themselves adequately.  Overall, last year, 36,200,000 children and adults in the United States (almost the population of the State of California) struggled with hunger. 

America, land of plenty?  Perhaps, but not for all.  How do we fix this problem? 

I feel a bit sorry for Sarah Palin.  She was asked to be a candidate for vice president of the United States.  Willing to serve her country, she said, “yes.”

Following her selection some people said she was just what the Republican party needed to win.  Others said she wasn’t.  Some cheered her “just plain folks” background.  Others jeered.  When the Republicans lost the presidential election, whispering began that it was Sarah Palin’s fault.  These are her “rewards” for saying yes.

Now there is news that she is being offered a seven-figure amount to write a book.  One wonders if that idea of a book is to inform, or to line the pockets of a publisher who is betting the book will sell well.  Will the book be an advocate for Governor Palin or a taking advantage of her?  I’m cynical enough to bet it’s the latter.

I didn’t vote for Sarah Palin, but she sure has my respect.  She was asked to serve in a big way and said yes.  In that regard, we need more Sarah Palins.

My being told by Bishop Smith that the path to ordination as a deacon is closed, with no second chance, was almost as devastating as my dad’s death just a few weeks before that.  A quest of 16 years is over.

I am disappointed.  I am also angry as hell.  The scene that keeps coming to mind is Sally Field in Steel Magnolias, at the cemetery just after burying her daughter.  She’s so angry she says she just wants to hit someone, but doesn’t know who.  “I want to hit them until they feel as bad as I do.”  Of course, the tension is broken when Olympia Dukakis grabs Shirley MacLaine and says, “Here, hit Ouiser.  Knock her lights out.  Half of Chikopin Parish would give their eye teeth to hit her.”  The group of women burst into laughter, except for Shirley MacLaine.  That’s how I feel.  I want someone to hurt as bad as I do.  But unlike the women, I have no Ouiser Boudreaux, and I’m not laughing.

Somebody asked me last week who I was mad at at Advent.  Dan?  The congregation?  Absolutely not.  People who have heard the news have been very supportive.  Dan has been an absolute rock in helping me digest all that has happened.

Honestly, I don’t have much use for the Episcopal Church in general right now.  But when it comes to Church of the Advent, all those feelings go away.  In my anger I have given strong consideration to returning to the United Methodist Church.  But then I think of everyone at Advent, and know I have to stay.  There’s no place like home.

But I’m still angry.  How do I get over it?

Dear Sisters and Brothers at Advent,
 
I feel that I owe the congregation an apology. 
 
In a one hour meeting earlier this month, the Commission on Ministry determined they could discern what they needed to know about my qualifications and recommended to Bishop Smith that I not go further towards becoming a deacon.  Bishop Smith concurred with the Commission’s recommendation.
 
Essentially, as I understand it, their reasons were that I was not sufficiently immersed in Episcopal polity and theology, and perhaps still too Methodist.   I’m not sure I agree, but that’s how they saw it.
 
My apology is this:  My eventually becoming a deacon was part of a dream Fr. Dan shared with me for Advent’s future.  Now that’s not to be.  I know I still have a ministry at Church of the Advent and that my ministry doesn’t need the validation of the Commission on Ministry.  My disappointment is that I can’t be the deacon in Advent’s future.  I feel like I have let Advent down, and I am terribly sorry.
 
Jim

If you follow this blog closely, you will have noticed the change in the masthead.  It used to say something about my alter-ego, Brother Andrew, The Church Mouse.  After two years, I’ve decided to go public with who is writing this blog.  It will allow me more latitude in what I say by not having to try to disguise my identity.  It will also allow comments on my remarks to come directly to me — my thanks to Father Dan, who has relayed verbal comments since 2006. 

It has been fun listening to speculation about who the author has been up to now.  The one person most named has been my friend, Bill Sanders.  I think that when people would ask him directly about being Brother Andrew, Bill would be intentionally vague in his answer, continuing the subtrefuge.

So, the ink will continue to flow, but Andrew has retired to the comfort of his mouse house behind the stove in Advent’s kitchen — a life of sipping Earl Grey tea and nibbling on Asiago cheese bagels.

Jim

October 27, 2008

The other Sunday, I was ready for church early and was on my way to my “pew” by a red piece of stained glass in the window above the choir and organ. Taking a rest, I began looking at the religious banners that Marla Dell has made that hang in the sanctuary. I got to looking at the one right above my head and I wondered, “what was Marla trying to communicate with her art work?”Then I began to wonder, “What does Marla’s artwork say to me?” Wow! In five minutes of meditation on that question the banner I was contemplating got me thinking about lots of things. Some apiritual and some just every day things that I encounter in my daily life.